No idea....

Figured it was a great time to finally update. Nothing new, really. Had an appointment today. Heart beat was 138. Supposedly, that means its a boy. I really hope its not. I know that is horrible to say, but I really want a girl. I seriously would not know what to do with a boy. My mother keeps telling "if it's a boy, he'll still look cute in little pink dresses." No, mother. IF its a boy, you will not be putting him in dresses. Either way, part of me just feels like its a girl. I hope it is. I have my heart set on a baby girl. Anyway, haven't felt my baby move at all lately, my midwife said that was common since I'm only 18 weeks. I should feel my baby move more come week 22. I'll know the gender by then. I find out less than 2 weeks from now. It's Monday now and I find out next Thursday. I am so excited to find out!
Lately, I've been getting dizzy more often than before. It's not very fun. Especially at work. Even less fun when your boss is a jerk. I have a doctor's note that says I need to sit. He gets pissed every time I sit. The other day, I got so dizzy and kept blacking out, he refused to let me go home, so I sat down in a chair, at my register. Yet, he threatened to change my hours, clocking me out for an hour while I was working, because I was sitting. Thankfully, I know that is illegal and I called him on it. Today at my appointment though, I got an updated note. Now, with having TWO different notes, written by different doctors, on the same matter, if he says anything, I will be going over his head and getting corporate involved. Its the only thing I can think of doing, sadly. But, I'm just waiting for him to slip up again. No one likes him, he doesn't do his job, and he is just an ass. Excuse my language. I've made sure not to tell him about my Asperger's. Not that I'm embarrassed, I'm not, its who I am, BUT, I know he'll treat me differently if he knew. The other managers know, but I just can't tell him.I think that's it for today. Promise to post when I find out the sex!

Pregnancy Hormones

Second post today. I just had to talk about this though, so I'm sorry if it's short...
My parents and I were watching a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes. (Spoilers follow) At first, I really liked the movie. It was interesting. For a girl with Asperger's, it was relatively easy to follow. Especially since it had animals. (Not all Aspie's necessarily like animals, but I do.) Anyway, it centers around one ape/chimpanzee named Ceaser. He was basically family to a character played by James Franco, and referred to as his son. Now, some things happened that cause Ceaser to be placed in a "sanctuary" where he was treated horribly by Dodge, played by Tom Felton. At one point, Dodge sprayed Ceaser with a fire house. Poor Ceaser was in a soaking wet shirt his "father" gave him, in a soaking wet cage, with concrete as the floor. When he curled up on the floor, obviously looking depressed, I started to feel my eyes watering. Then when Ceaser found a rock in his cage, he used it to draw on the wall. He drew a window that was in his room and his home, with his "dad"... that's when I lost it. Started crying a lot. Bawling really. I had to leave the room. Then my mom had me go with her to her room to calm down. I was cuddling my puppy, Luna, and I was still crying. Cried for about 20 minutes after. Needless to say, I didn't see any more of that movie, nor do I plan to.
This is supposed to have been brought on by my pregnancy hormones. Which I can believe. But, I wonder if it had to deal with my Asperger's and love of animals. Like, I knew the movie was fake and that Ceaser was played by a human, but I couldn't help it. Especially knowing that people test on animals, who are probably treated like this. It's just not fair.

Sex and Asperger's

We all know where baby's come from. People being silly and having unprotected sex. Back in June, I moved in with a "friend".... well, someone I thought was a friend. Anyway, I wanted to prove the Doctors wrong who told my parents and I that I wouldn't be able to fend for myself or live without them. Needless to say, I was wrong. Very wrong. That's how I got pregnant. I was being careless. Tried having sex... Most awkward thing ever. Not sure why people do it at all. Its disgusting. My body is my body. No one needs to enter it. But, I will admit, without that, I wouldn't have my precious baby in my stomach. Trust me though, NEVER again. Unless, I meet Johnny Depp. I think I can make an exception for that.
I obviously moved back in with my parents when I found out I was pregnant. Best decision I've made. This way I know my baby will have the life they deserve. I know my baby will be loved and cared for and won't have to deal with Mommy always being broke. This way, since the father is out of the picture, I'll have help when needed. Thanks to my AMAZING parents.